Divorce is never an easy thing to get right. When there’s children involved it can feel like the emotions and challenges are amplified.
So as parents what can we do to make sure that we make the entire experience easier on our children? Here’s a few approaches to bear in mind.
A United Front
This can certainly be difficult, especially if you are both engaging with family law solicitors. But you have to remember that whenever possible, your children understand the divorce plans.
By presenting a united front, it will help the children understand that both parents are involved and still supportive of them.
A united front is certainly difficult to achieve, especially when there are emotions at play, but it’s critical to remember that the children are the priority in every single situation.
Open and Honest Communication
You will need to discuss this with your children at some point. Therefore, you have to remember that in addition to being age-appropriate, you are providing reassurance that it’s nothing to do with the children.
Divorce is an incredibly confusing time for children because they feel like they’re losing their parents.
Ensuring that you are communicating openly and honestly will go some way to give them some form of peace of mind, even if everything else feels like it is up in the air.
You need to reassure your children that you and the other parent still love them.
Divorce can create a lot of uncertainty, and children need to feel like there is something consistent and this consistency can be in the way of you both showing your child or children that they are a priority in both of your lives.
It is vital to ensure that, amid the chaos, both parents are working towards doing something for the sake of the children.
Allow Your Children to Express Themselves
You might very well feel frazzled and emotionally drained but it’s important that the children remain the centre of this storm, and this also means that they will invariably feel confused and angry.
You need to encourage your children to express their concerns and feelings without any form of judgement.
Give them the emotional support necessary and ensure that even if they are feeling like they can’t speak to you, you are there and ready for them when they do feel like they can.
Sometimes divorce can amplify feelings of separation between parent and child because the communication wasn’t there in the first place.
This is the ideal opportunity for you to show your children that you are going to be a far better parent than you ever were before.
Refrain From Blaming
It can be so easy to say it’s someone else’s fault. You have to stop blaming each other in front of the children and you cannot put your kids in the middle of any conflict or disagreement.
You are supposed to be working together and while one of you may be a great parent and the other one has a lot to learn, this doesn’t mean that the better parent can remain on their high horse. You have to keep it civil.
It is certainly tough to go through the process but hopefully, some of these methods can make it easier on the children.